IF IT'S A FOREVER THING WHY ARE YOU STILL TALKING?

Maybe it's the weather

So maybe it's the weather that's making me feel this way. Maybe it's the relationship, or the friendship, or my poppa. Or all of them combined. But I am feeling down.
No appetite.
None at all.
Sleeping late.
Staying up later.
Pushing through the tiredness.
I wanna stay home.
I wanna do nothing.
I wanna go out.
I wanna party.
And forget about everything.

I wanna do something wild. Something different. Something to make me not feel.

But I've been here before, and I don't think that's the answer.

Ps. I need to brush my teeth.

Am I Okay?

Dude, you care now? That's strange, I thought we weren't talking. But yeah! I'm fine! "Are you sure?"

WTF.

No, you know what, I'm not okay. I feel like crap. This has been a bad week.

A bad few weeks.

First Thanksgiving since he died.
His first birthday, since he died.
Freaking Latin Mass...
Frustration.
Loss of friend.
And my friend's dog died. And that bothers me too. Because I love that dog. Best dog in the world.
Exams.

Exammmmms.

So no, I'm really not okay. But you really don't care. So yeah, I'm fine.

Uh oh overlapping shifts!

I'm happier today. Like I promised. But my back hurts, because of blocking haha.

I don't really have anything to write about. Other than lots of LOLZing.

And almost dying from LOLZing at Sarah finding out Dumbledore is gay. Hahahahha.

I am aware, I've been misled

I disconnect my heart, my head.

Tomorrow I'll tell a happier story.

While we're on this topic of breaking hearts and betrayal and whatever else I've been rambling about haha I forgot one!!

A couple years ago I met this guy through a friend. He was a few years older than me and we weren't really talking like, "Hey let's go out" talking. We were just talking. But he basically told me I was the kinda girl he would wanna be with. So for several months, we're pretty tight. Like getting to be really good friends it seems like.

Theeeeen guess what happens!!

He has a date with this girl. And all the sudden, he can't talk to me anymore. Six months later, they're married. WTF. Am I destined to be the girl-until-I-find-a-better-one girl?

I can't believe I forgot that one. That was a major one.



Sooo here's something for a change of subject (which I promise will come tomorrow for real if I remember to blog).

I totally thought my speech exam was today, but it's not. There's still a-whole-nother group that has to speak!! So that kinda sucks cause I wanted to get it over with and be done today. But no, I have to go in Thursday.

Oh wells.

I love ya'lls that read this whoever you are!

Also

I haven't done this in a while because I haven't been checking postsecret. Sad!!

This is why I never sent you pictures


This is what I hope to do



-----Email Message-----
Sent: Sunday, December 07, 2008 11:13 PM
Subject: spend christmas with her

spend christmas with me.



She is treading water still.
Hopelessly hopeless,
and she is swimming,
further into the sea.
Thinking she's substandard,
While all the while,
She is beautiful to me.

She is strong and silent,
She is blunt and shrewd,
She thinks that nobody loves her,
If she only knew,
How much we all have missed her,
We are praying for you, my little sister

I hope she gives you all the kinky sex you knew you would never get from me.