I'm working on that list...

Only to 039.

Ooooops.

I'm starting something new.  It'll be posted here soon.  I'm gonna commit to do 101 things in 1001 days.

Started here.

A good example is here.

I think I'm gonna create a new blog for it, just so it has its own page, but I'll blog ABOUT it here.

One of the things is gonna be to take a self portrait every day for a year.  There's a flickr group.  I started to try last year and failed.  So, hopefully I'll be able to get it done.  I need to do things.  I need to change.  I need to get involved.

I can't win. I can't win. I can't win.

I don't even think I want you anymore and I'm still hurting over this.

Dreaming about it.  That's how I know something is on my mind.  Even when I try to push it out, it still pops up.  It just hurts so much that in one of our last conversations I said, "I'd rather have truth, than happiness from lies" and you still lied...

What you did was spiteful.  Congratulations.  You finally won.

We won't be friends until this is over.  I don't see it lasting, but who knows.  And then you'll come back, apologizing and saying how wrong you were.  Because isn't that how all boys are?

I am through with boys.  I've decided.  I am through with trying to deal with the immaturity.

I need to find me a man.

And you!  The other one!  Why won't you freakin' talk to me?!

This is my ranting, emo, complaining post.  How did everything go from being happy and nice (albeit frustrating) to this...?

You freakin' lied to me.

Not the casual dating type...bs.

And yeah I saw her talking to my friend and went to stand by them because I was waiting for him.  She completely ignored me and kinda gave me a dirty look.  Now I know why.

Great...I see the bitch everywhere.

I didn't even have that much stock in you and somehow I still end up heartbroken.

What do I want?

Well that is a good question.

I don't feel like I want a serious relationship.

But I don't want to be the "booty call" girl either.

If there was even the glimmer of a future, I wouldn't mind so much, but you don't want a relationship either, so I refuse to be that girl.  I refuse to be used.

In other news, my phone is sucking again.  I've already had it replaced twice so I think it's time for them to give me a new, different kind of phone.  I would like an iPhone.  I can only choose from 3 phones though.  So that kinda sucks.

In other, other news, I'm feelings worse again.  Migraines everyday, bloating, achey body.  I don't sleep through the night, even on sleeping pills.  I just can't wake up in the morning.

All I do is complain.

This song is in a commercial.  I like it haha.

http://90210.mysfdomain.com/state_farm_sixteen.mp3

Called it.