Tuesday, December 16, 2008


My body is tired.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Dear person,
Maybe it's because I just woke up (yeah I know it's after noon haha), but I've taken a new view on all this. When I finally become coherent I'll probably be all, "Aghhh" again. But for now, I don't care. I mean, if you stopped caring so long ago (HA!), then I really shouldn't care at all. I just hope you lead a happy, happy life. Because you were a nice friend for a month. And you deserve some happiness. So have a nice life :)

Love (or don't),
you're no longer friend, Karlee.

Saturday, December 13, 2008


Maybe it's the weather

So maybe it's the weather that's making me feel this way. Maybe it's the relationship, or the friendship, or my poppa. Or all of them combined. But I am feeling down.
No appetite.
None at all.
Sleeping late.
Staying up later.
Pushing through the tiredness.
I wanna stay home.
I wanna do nothing.
I wanna go out.
I wanna party.
And forget about everything.

I wanna do something wild. Something different. Something to make me not feel.

But I've been here before, and I don't think that's the answer.

Ps. I need to brush my teeth.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Am I Okay?

Dude, you care now? That's strange, I thought we weren't talking. But yeah! I'm fine! "Are you sure?"


No, you know what, I'm not okay. I feel like crap. This has been a bad week.

A bad few weeks.

First Thanksgiving since he died.
His first birthday, since he died.
Freaking Latin Mass...
Loss of friend.
And my friend's dog died. And that bothers me too. Because I love that dog. Best dog in the world.


So no, I'm really not okay. But you really don't care. So yeah, I'm fine.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Uh oh overlapping shifts!

I'm happier today. Like I promised. But my back hurts, because of blocking haha.

I don't really have anything to write about. Other than lots of LOLZing.

And almost dying from LOLZing at Sarah finding out Dumbledore is gay. Hahahahha.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

I am aware, I've been misled

I disconnect my heart, my head.

Tomorrow I'll tell a happier story.

While we're on this topic of breaking hearts and betrayal and whatever else I've been rambling about haha I forgot one!!

A couple years ago I met this guy through a friend. He was a few years older than me and we weren't really talking like, "Hey let's go out" talking. We were just talking. But he basically told me I was the kinda girl he would wanna be with. So for several months, we're pretty tight. Like getting to be really good friends it seems like.

Theeeeen guess what happens!!

He has a date with this girl. And all the sudden, he can't talk to me anymore. Six months later, they're married. WTF. Am I destined to be the girl-until-I-find-a-better-one girl?

I can't believe I forgot that one. That was a major one.

Sooo here's something for a change of subject (which I promise will come tomorrow for real if I remember to blog).

I totally thought my speech exam was today, but it's not. There's still a-whole-nother group that has to speak!! So that kinda sucks cause I wanted to get it over with and be done today. But no, I have to go in Thursday.

Oh wells.

I love ya'lls that read this whoever you are!

Monday, December 8, 2008


I haven't done this in a while because I haven't been checking postsecret. Sad!!

This is why I never sent you pictures

This is what I hope to do

-----Email Message-----
Sent: Sunday, December 07, 2008 11:13 PM
Subject: spend christmas with her

spend christmas with me.

She is treading water still.
Hopelessly hopeless,
and she is swimming,
further into the sea.
Thinking she's substandard,
While all the while,
She is beautiful to me.

She is strong and silent,
She is blunt and shrewd,
She thinks that nobody loves her,
If she only knew,
How much we all have missed her,
We are praying for you, my little sister
I hope she gives you all the kinky sex you knew you would never get from me.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Happy Birthday

I have had my heart broken by a few boys in my life. Never really while dating them though. I always do the breaking up.

No these are the boys that seemingly just want to be friends. Or maybe they mention they might want to be more. But let's get to know each other first. Or maybe they're just flirtatious. And the problem starts right about here. Where I start to fall for them.

Then something happens.

They change their mind.
I make them mad.
Or they just stop talking.
Or, most recently, I am told to just stop talking.

And I've got to tell you, that it breaks my heart.

It always gets to the point where I think I've found a new best friend or I get quite attached and then I am left to fend for myself, again.

I can feel it. With every inch of my being.

But I can't cry.

Tomorrow is poppa's birthday. It's gonna be a hard one. My grandma is coming to spend the night so she won't have to be alone. That makes it harder.

It's also Sarah's birthday tomorrow. Happy birthday Sarah.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Meds finally came in and I enjoyed a lovely Thanksgiving with a lot more family than I thought would be there. And it was lovely.

My store gave away all the pies and cakes and half-price Thanksgiving flowers so they wouldn't rot that day. So I got flowers for all of the ladies in my family and some pies and what not. It was great.

I've been all poopy feeling lately. Part of it was the withdrawals I think. But now I just feel kinda depressed. End of my third semester of college and its a pain. My brain is...soot.

Blah blah blah.