Saturday, December 5, 2009

In love with tragedy..

Why do I always write from my bed?
Because I get sad.
Why do I always get sad in bed?
Becaue I'm alone. My thoughts have time to wander. I take the whole day and the whole week and everything and dump it on myself at once because I couldn't deal with it earlier. No wonder I can't sleep.

I have this weird feeling. And I can't figure out where it's coming from or what it is.

I finished my portfolio I was stressing over. I have just a few exams left.

I should be feeling better.

I feel like I'm hiding from the world. No one knows how I really feel. But I have happy times. I'm not crying or moody. I just don't understand. I kind of wonder if the depression is back, it's just not full on because of the medicine. So what's worse? Fake, empty happiness or deep depression?

At least the weather is nice. And by nice, I mean rainy and gloomy and starting to cool off.