So I'm thinking. If I were still at my first school, I first off don't know if I'd be alive.


I would have come back for the summer and worked a horrible job. I would have watched my grandpa slowly whither away and die. I would have seen the toll it took on my dad and grandma and realized there was nothing I could do. And then I would have gone back.


I would have gone back to almost no friends. My one roommate would have moved back home. My other would have moved out the next semester. I don't know if I would have stayed in my relationship or relied on it. I'd like to think that I would has plugged myself in with the few people I knew. But I don't think I would have. If I made it to second semester I would have gotten a frantic call one Sunday morning that my dad was going to the emergency room. I would have had to go to an emergency room by myself twice.


Most of the people I talk to are from work. A place I wouldn't be if I had stayed up there (although other things wouldn't have happened as well). I wouldn't have my sorority because the chapter up there dissolved. I'd have no church (even one I don't go to).


But the point I want to make is that, I'm pretty sure I would have killed myself. And through all the last two years have brought me, I'm thankful for my life.